flash

he limped in
soggy, sodden, and cold,
recalcitrant, as he recited
dirty limericks in a
barely recognizable tongue.
my grandfather was
a fighter,
but he'd lost one too many,
too many knocks,
and now he breathed
corn mash and fire
at us, the family,
gathered to celebrate the life
of the dearly departed,
the woman he loved,
the only one that made any sense
to him, she who could soothe
the savage beast before us.
Now this lion had no tamer,
and he began to knock us around,
his sons pushed him out the door,
and stayed with him in the dark.
The sky emptied itself squarely
upon him and his succour,
his brood, his clan, and
they too were lit now with his fire
and they hit each other and they cried.

Then, there was a flash,
and I could see him with my grandmother
they were dancing; and he looked over
at me, and he smiled and winked,
and I thought I'd burst with that feeling
That feeling of being a part of something
Intended by God himself.

I'll never forget how that felt,
like a left hook out of nowhere,
ever the fighter, my grandpa.

Posted by Hans Andersen | at 8:29 PM | 0 comments

Laser

I am

Scattered light
Bewildered by my own complexity
Everyone's everything at all times
In all places
I am
Bending around
All the gaps in natural selection
Deeply entangled in primordial eddies
Graceless cur
I am
Bound by you
To quantum states that don't exist
In any real sense of time or space
My real senses
Offend
The logic, the tyranny
The bombasts, the wasteland, the harmony
The Opera, the cavern, the fulcrum
The list goes on
And on
Until we meet
The shared path on the last page
Of data, after time stopped running
Expertly merged
And one

Posted by Hans Andersen | at 3:00 AM | 0 comments

Breakfast of Champions

Increasingly I find myself

In the deep end of a pool
I cannot swim.  I don't know how.
I'm just standing there.
Feeling death throes of the mind
While the body, passive, complicit
Shows no signs of concern
Waking up is akin to 
Recognizing suddenly that
I'm not supposed to be there.
And willing myself out onto the side.
My first thought on getting out
Was not that I was dry
But that my aunt was probably Kurt Vonnegut
We could have talked about all that
And she would have taught me how to laugh about it
(She learned to laugh about it after
her son's brain was fried by chemotherapy
meant to save his life.)
We never got to talk about it, because I had it turned around.
I was supposed to save her,
but I was never prepared for that conversation
I never had the time
So it goes.

Now my dad's brain is funny
And I have nothing to say about
how it all works, how to be happy--
"You know, I'm a Christian who believes in everything
but the hopeful parts."

And that's how I found myself in the deep end.

I have to go.  I have to eat my salad.


Posted by Hans Andersen | at 8:36 AM | 0 comments

Gacrux

you are not going to think of me
for an infinite amount of time
unless I put myself
right in front of your snout
I would
if I knew it meant
an end to the suffering,
yours and mine.

there, I did it.
it is finished.
and still, you suffer
so, too, shall I
now and for all of time.
we all knew, didn't we?
that I could make up the difference.
and yet... I condemn all things.


(smiles with bared teeth,
teeth the size of a universe)

Posted by Hans Andersen | at 12:27 PM | 0 comments

autumn

Fall fire
The moon coolly
sets us all
ablaze
and then recedes,
leaving the tousled tops
of mountains
for dead.
Leaving you
in a state
of decay.
Leaving me
with quite a view
from just over the top
of my hardest cider.

Drip, it
All must drip down
and mix.
And then, ferment.

New life
from death.
See!
Like finest silk
threads formed across
what used to be
your mouth.

The violet sky spattered
With black silhouettes
Of All Things we did
And only you would know
If they're any more
Than mere shadows
On a dank cave wall

Posted by Hans Andersen | at 5:15 PM | 0 comments

FRB

A short
                              BURST
and then
nothing.

Speculate wildly about
the
                         IMMENSE
amount of
energy.

What it
                               ALL
means.

What happened here
where conscious gained
                                                REFLECTIVE
properties

I sought to fill a void the size of 10 billion Milky Ways with something that would last forever,
And all I came up with were things that had been tried and tried again over the last seventy thousand years.
How can you expect me to
                                                                                                           LIE
To all these creatures and tell them that it means
                                                                     SOMETHING                                        NOTHING

Posted by Hans Andersen | at 6:11 AM | 0 comments

Apophis

You know, my God, Apophis
Where I found you
Or better to say
Where you found me
Sitting in a cafe
Contemplating this morning's sermon
Where I was reminded that I
Was in the midst
Of the Messianic Era
Waiting in between
Important Moments
For You
Knowing you came before
And that you would come again
And then, Apophis
Heralded by the most sordid
Of sundry tabloids
As if to trivialize
This species and its
Impact.  Funny
I should use that word
Laugh, now, when there is still reason
To do so.
Apophis,
On a septillion mile journey
For billions of years
To meet Creation
Now we tear ourselves
And each other apart, exactly
As you would have us do
In accordance with your nature,
Chaos.
But we stand together and prepare
To keep you from our blue marble barge
And see you off!
But you know this, you know
We'll watch you, heads swirling
Hearts throbbing, eyes bursting,
Brains boiling, until we have done
Exactly what you would have us do:
Live in disarray, live in fear,
Deny the sun and welcome darkness
On our way to saving the world
From ourselves

Posted by Hans Andersen | at 7:38 AM | 0 comments